Clikrs

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MISSION UPDATE: Operation Thaw-Point Recovery. 🧊🪖As the winter frost retreats, the 'landmines' are resurfacing. What was...
18/02/2026

MISSION UPDATE: Operation Thaw-Point Recovery. 🧊🪖

As the winter frost retreats, the 'landmines' are resurfacing. What was hidden under the ice is now a tactical hazard in your own backyard. Your garden is rapidly becoming a 'No-Go Zone' for both you and your pets.

The Turd Burglars Special Ops team is deploying in full tactical gear: charcoal, grey, and hi-vis green. We don't just scoop; we execute a precision sweep to restore safety to your sector.

Don't wait for the thaw to turn your lawn into a swamp of despair. Secure your extraction now.

📞 Call the TB HQ: 0161 520 1670

💎 The Luxury You Didn't Know You Needed (But Definitely Do) 💎Imagine a world where you never, ever have to pick up dog w...
18/02/2026

💎 The Luxury You Didn't Know You Needed (But Definitely Do) 💎

Imagine a world where you never, ever have to pick up dog waste again. Sounds like a dream? For our clients in Sandbach and Crewe, it’s a reality! ✨💩

Turd Burglars provides the ultimate garden luxury service. We handle the dirty work so you can enjoy your outdoor space in pure comfort. This is a premium service for those who value their time and their garden. Please note: we don't do freebies, just pure professionalism.

💰 **The Luxury Pricing Table:**
🐕 1 Dog: Monthly £40 | Bi-Weekly £55 | Weekly £70 | Twice-Weekly £130
🐕🐕 2 Dogs: Monthly £45 | Bi-Weekly £60 | Weekly £80 | Twice-Weekly £145
🐕🐕🐕 3 Dogs: Monthly £50 | Bi-Weekly £65 | Weekly £90 | Twice-Weekly £160
🐕🐕🐕🐕 4 Dogs: Monthly £55 | Bi-Weekly £70 | Weekly £100 | Twice-Weekly £175

Treat yourself to a scoop-free life.
📞 Call us on 0161 520 1670

💎

Let’s keep Cheshire beautiful! 🇬🇧✨Crewe and Sandbach are fantastic places to live, and we all want to keep our neighborh...
18/02/2026

Let’s keep Cheshire beautiful! 🇬🇧✨

Crewe and Sandbach are fantastic places to live, and we all want to keep our neighborhoods clean. Don't fall foul of the local council's crackdown on dog waste or those dreaded 'pink poo' fines. Turd Burglars keeps your property compliant and your street pride high!

💰 OUR PRICING (Monthly, VAT included):
🐾 1 Dog: £40
🐾 2 Dogs: £45
🐾 3 Dogs: £50
🐾 4 Dogs: £55

Frequencies: Monthly / Bi-weekly (every 2 weeks) / Weekly / 2x Weekly (twice per week)

💳 Payment: Upfront at sign-up, then monthly Direct Debit in advance.

🚫 Notice: We do not offer freebies. High standards, every time.

📞 Stay compliant, call: 0161 520 1670

The ultimate luxury? Never scooping again. ✨ Imagine a life where the mess just... vanishes. Treat yourself to the Turd ...
18/02/2026

The ultimate luxury? Never scooping again. ✨

Imagine a life where the mess just... vanishes. Treat yourself to the Turd Burglars service in Crewe and Sandbach. It’s the home upgrade you didn’t know you needed until you had it. No mess, no smell, no stress. Just a pristine garden ready for you to enjoy.

💰 Monthly / Bi-weekly / Weekly / Twice-weekly:
🐕 1 Dog: £40 / £55 / £70 / £130
🐕🐕 2 Dogs: £45 / £60 / £80 / £145
🐕🐕🐕 3 Dogs: £50 / £65 / £90 / £160
🐕🐕🐕🐕 4 Dogs: £55 / £70 / £100 / £175

📞 Reclaim your garden: 0161 520 1670.
Strictly professional service( no freebies.)

🇬🇧 Keep Crewe & Sandbach Clean! 🇬🇧We take pride in our local community, and we know you do too. Don't fall foul of local...
18/02/2026

🇬🇧 Keep Crewe & Sandbach Clean! 🇬🇧

We take pride in our local community, and we know you do too. Don't fall foul of local regulations or risk those dreaded 'pink poo' fines. Keeping your own garden clear is the first step to being a responsible pet owner in Cheshire! 🏆🐕

Turd Burglars helps you stay compliant and keeps our local area looking its best. Our service is professional, thorough, and strictly paid-only (no freebies here!).

💰 **Our Community-First Pricing:**
🐕 1 Dog: Monthly £40 | Bi-Weekly £55 | Weekly £70 | Twice-Weekly £130
🐕🐕 2 Dogs: Monthly £45 | Bi-Weekly £60 | Weekly £80 | Twice-Weekly £145
🐕🐕🐕 3 Dogs: Monthly £50 | Bi-Weekly £65 | Weekly £90 | Twice-Weekly £160
🐕🐕🐕🐕 4 Dogs: Monthly £55 | Bi-Weekly £70 | Weekly £100 | Twice-Weekly £175

Be a proud pet owner.
📞 Call 0161 520 1670 to book.

ATTENTION SANDBACH: We’re looking for the CW11 Crime Scene of the Year! Which street in Sandbach is currently the worst ...
17/02/2026

ATTENTION SANDBACH: We’re looking for the CW11 Crime Scene of the Year!

Which street in Sandbach is currently the worst for ‘landmines’? We’ve heard some horror stories about the pavements lately, but we want to know the real hotspots. Is your daily walk starting to feel like a high-stakes mission? Drop the street name in the comments!

If the crime scene has moved into your own back garden, the Turd Burglars are on patrol. We provide thorough, discreet cleanups using kennel-grade disinfectant and professional waste disposal so you can enjoy your lawn again.

Monthly Prices (VAT Inclusive):
1 Dog: £40/mo
2 Dogs: £45/mo
3 Dogs: £50/mo
4 Dogs: £55/mo
(Bi-weekly = every 2 weeks; 2x Weekly = twice per week)

Terms: Payment is upfront at sign-up, then monthly Direct Debit in advance.

Ready to clear the field?
Call or text us: 0161 520 1670
Visit: www.turdburglars.co.uk

Comment “REPORT” or “CRIME REPORT” below and we’ll DM you our official Crime Report form to get you a quote!

⏳ Between the school run and work, who has time for p**p-scooping? ⏳Life in Crewe and Sandbach is busy enough without ad...
17/02/2026

⏳ Between the school run and work, who has time for p**p-scooping? ⏳

Life in Crewe and Sandbach is busy enough without adding 'The Great Garden Clear-up' to your daily to-do list. Let Turd Burglars take that messy chore off your hands so you can spend your weekends enjoying your garden, not cleaning it! 🏃💨

We offer a professional, scheduled service that fits your life. No gimmicks, no freebies, just a perfectly clean garden every time.

💰 **Our Time-Saving Rates:**
🐕 1 Dog: Monthly £40 | Bi-Weekly £55 | Weekly £70 | Twice-Weekly £130
🐕🐕 2 Dogs: Monthly £45 | Bi-Weekly £60 | Weekly £80 | Twice-Weekly £145
🐕🐕🐕 3 Dogs: Monthly £50 | Bi-Weekly £65 | Weekly £90 | Twice-Weekly £160
🐕🐕🐕🐕 4 Dogs: Monthly £55 | Bi-Weekly £70 | Weekly £100 | Twice-Weekly £175

Reclaim your time today!
📞 Call us: 0161 520 1670

Crewe! It’s time for the ultimate Flip-Flop Minefield Challenge. We all have that ONE mate in Crewe whose garden is a ta...
17/02/2026

Crewe! It’s time for the ultimate Flip-Flop Minefield Challenge.

We all have that ONE mate in Crewe whose garden is a tactical nightmare. You know the one: you need a hazmat suit and a map just to reach the patio without a "landmine" incident.

Tag that friend below and let them know it’s time to call in the professionals! At Turd Burglars, we provide regular cleanups, kennel-grade disinfectant, and proper professional disposal so you can enjoy your garden again without the unpleasant chore of p**p scooping.

Residential Monthly Rates (VAT inclusive):
1 Dog: £40/mo
2 Dogs: £45/mo
3 Dogs: £50/mo
4 Dogs: £55/mo

Service Frequencies:
Bi-weekly = every 2 weeks
2x Weekly = twice per week

Payment is upfront at sign-up, then monthly Direct Debit in advance.

Ready to "Report a Crime Scene"? Tag a mate who needs us, call/text 0161 520 1670, or just comment "CRIME REPORT" or "REPORT" below and we’ll DM you the form to get started!

www.turdburglars.co.uk

🐾 Healthy Paws, Clean Floors! 🐾Did you know that dog waste can harbour parasites and bacteria that aren't just bad for y...
17/02/2026

🐾 Healthy Paws, Clean Floors! 🐾

Did you know that dog waste can harbour parasites and bacteria that aren't just bad for your garden, but can be tracked right into your Sandbach home? 🦠👣

Don't let your four-legged friends bring the 'outside' in. Turd Burglars ensures your yard in Crewe is waste-free, keeping your pets and your family safe from nasty germs. We’re professional, reliable, and we strictly don't offer freebies: just premium service for premium pet owners.

💰 **Our Service Rates:**
🐕 1 Dog: Monthly £40 | Bi-Weekly £55 | Weekly £70 | Twice-Weekly £130
🐕🐕 2 Dogs: Monthly £45 | Bi-Weekly £60 | Weekly £80 | Twice-Weekly £145
🐕🐕🐕 3 Dogs: Monthly £50 | Bi-Weekly £65 | Weekly £90 | Twice-Weekly £160
🐕🐕🐕🐕 4 Dogs: Monthly £55 | Bi-Weekly £70 | Weekly £100 | Twice-Weekly £175

Keep your family's health a priority.
📞 Call now: 0161 520 1670

Imagine a world where you NEVER have to pick up p**p again... 🥂✨It’s not a dream: it’s Turd Burglars. Serving the finest...
17/02/2026

Imagine a world where you NEVER have to pick up p**p again... 🥂✨

It’s not a dream: it’s Turd Burglars. Serving the finest gardens in Sandbach and Crewe, we offer a luxury experience that removes the most unpleasant chore from your to-do list forever. Discreet, professional, and perfect for the busy homeowner who values their leisure time.

Exquisite service, no freebies.

💰 OUR PRICING (Monthly | Bi-Weekly | Weekly | Twice-Weekly):
🐕 1 Dog: £40 | £55 | £70 | £130
🐕🐕 2 Dogs: £45 | £60 | £80 | £145
🐕🐕🐕 3 Dogs: £50 | £65 | £90 | £160
🐕🐕🐕🐕 4 Dogs: £55 | £70 | £100 | £175

Treat yourself to a scoop-free life. Call us today: 0161 520 1670 📞

✨ The Ultimate Luxury: A Poop-Free Life in Cheshire! 🥂Imagine never, ever having to pick up dog p**p again. Sounds like ...
17/02/2026

✨ The Ultimate Luxury: A Poop-Free Life in Cheshire! 🥂

Imagine never, ever having to pick up dog p**p again. Sounds like a dream, right? In Crewe and Sandbach, that dream is a reality with Turd Burglars.

Think of us as your garden’s personal concierge. We come in, we clear out the mess, and we leave you with a pristine outdoor space. Walk barefoot on your lawn, host a BBQ without the 'smell of shame,' and enjoy the luxury of a chore-free life. It’s the service you didn’t know you needed, but won't be able to live without.

Our premium service is for those who value quality: no freebies, just pure convenience.

Pricing:
🐶 1 Dog: £40 (Monthly) | £55 (Bi-Weekly) | £70 (Weekly) | £130 (Twice-Weekly)
🐶🐶 2 Dogs: £45 (Monthly) | £60 (Bi-Weekly) | £80 (Weekly) | £145 (Twice-Weekly)
🐶🐶🐶 3 Dogs: £50 (Monthly) | £65 (Bi-Weekly) | £90 (Weekly) | £160 (Twice-Weekly)
🐶🐶🐶🐶 4 Dogs: £55 (Monthly) | £70 (Bi-Weekly) | £100 (Weekly) | £175 (Twice-Weekly)

Treat yourself to a clean garden!
📞 Call the pros: 0161 520 1670

🏡 Is your Crewe garden looking more 'burnt' than 'beautiful'? 🏡We love our dogs, but we don't love what their 'deposits'...
17/02/2026

🏡 Is your Crewe garden looking more 'burnt' than 'beautiful'? 🏡

We love our dogs, but we don't love what their 'deposits' do to a lush green lawn. If you're tired of seeing those unsightly brown patches in your Sandbach garden, it’s time to call in the professionals! 💩🚫

Turd Burglars provide a thorough, discreet service to keep your grass healthy and your shoes clean. We don't do freebies, but we do provide the best service in Cheshire!

💰 **Our Premium Rates (No Freebies!):**
🐕 1 Dog: Monthly £40 | Bi-Weekly £55 | Weekly £70 | Twice-Weekly £130
🐕🐕 2 Dogs: Monthly £45 | Bi-Weekly £60 | Weekly £80 | Twice-Weekly £145
🐕🐕🐕 3 Dogs: Monthly £50 | Bi-Weekly £65 | Weekly £90 | Twice-Weekly £160
🐕🐕🐕🐕 4 Dogs: Monthly £55 | Bi-Weekly £70 | Weekly £100 | Twice-Weekly £175

Ready for a lawn you can actually lounge on?
📞 Call us today: 0161 520 1670

Address

Manchester

Opening Hours

Monday 10am - 6pm
Tuesday 10am - 6pm
Wednesday 10am - 6pm
Thursday 10am - 6am
Friday 10am - 6pm
Saturday 10am - 6pm

Telephone

+447514902962

Website

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