FayeHere2There

FayeHere2There Just a gal here to provide you with budget travel experiences through the art of scheme patter.

Troops! It's been so long, hope yer all well and living the dream. 2025 will be the year where FayeHere2There is back wi...
18/01/2025

Troops! It's been so long, hope yer all well and living the dream. 2025 will be the year where FayeHere2There is back with a right boot tae the baws! Hopefully in about 40000 blog posts later i'll hit it big and Hays Travel, Elon Musk or Simon Cowell will chap ma scheme door for some patter and a travel suggestion (times are desperate and I'll take a piece at anybodies door to patch the day job, buy more tattoos and purchase heart medicine for my whippet with the dodgy ticker fs)

I'm recently back from a trip over the Christmas period which consisted of tanning pints of Guiness in Dublin, tanning 1 euro prosecco in a KGB pub in Bratislava, tanning potato pancakes in Budapest and tanning vegan schnitzel in Vienna. Don't worry all you carnivores, there's always meat on our Keirans plate for you all to see which I'll share with you all

I'll do some posts over the next wee while on budget scran, travel within these countries and places of interest. Time to see the world troops, even if yer a scheme goblin like myself ✈️

If you've followed me a wee while, you'll know I'm partial to a scran, love going out for my dinner and have bingo wings...
07/04/2024

If you've followed me a wee while, you'll know I'm partial to a scran, love going out for my dinner and have bingo wings like the lovechild of Ursula and Pavarotti due to this. So here comes a wee quick food review 😋

I've ate at Annapurna Gurkhas Restaurant in Kirkcaldy several times and I'd go as far to say that it's one of my favourite restaurants in Scotland. The staff are really friendly and will go out there way to recommend the best Nepalese/Indian curries suited to your tastes. Some may even say that the only reason I attend Raith Rovers FC games is if Keiran promises me a feed here afterwards 😅 Aye Keiran I promise this is the reason and it's nothing to do with The Rovers tidy goalie.

During my latest visit on Saturday, I had onion Bhaji to start. As you can see the portion size is generous (which is needed after listening to Keiran talk about the best strikers in The Scottish Championship all day) and the onion bhaji are the size of Everest itself. The starters are always well presented and creative and make Neil Buchanan look peesh!

For my main I got a Paneer Khursani Masala which is medium spice and my absolute go to dish, it's absolutely beaut and makes me tear up more than the thought of my best pals new born. Keiran always gets a chicken dish and opted for the Pasanda this time which he said was stunning (mad meat eating bass). We always share a coconut and pineapple rice with a peshwari nan and it's more than enough. Even for us tanks.

Definitely worth the 1hr 40 min drive for something to eat and with a pint of juice we were £40 between us.

The links market starts on 17th April in Kirkcaldy which is Europe's longest street fair and is on until 22nd April so just a wee idea for a day out for all you troops! Scran at a restaurant then for some donuts on the waltzers? Canny beat it.

Sorry troops for neglecting this page and not posting in 6 whole months, I'll no be bagging blog of the year in Cosmopol...
01/04/2024

Sorry troops for neglecting this page and not posting in 6 whole months, I'll no be bagging blog of the year in Cosmopolitan magazine anyway 🤣 I will try and blog my future travels though cause it really is my passion and I'll try any avenue to get recruited by a rich big fool who will pay for my travel in return for gid patter 😅

Last week, I was bored out my man cities and took a flight from Edinburgh airport to Poznan in Poland. What an underrated, fantastic, friendly city. I'd never been to Poland before and I know most people head to Krakow but I wanted to go a bit radge as usual. Poznan is quite close to the German border and therefore has an array of interesting museums from war related memorabilia to a croissant making museum. One minute I've got my hand on an AK47, the next I've got my hand on a spatula mixing in almonds like im doing a 9-5 in the Kandy Bar. I very nearly give in my notice to my current job and stayed in Poznan to bake the f**k oot of these bad boy St Martin croissants which Poznan are renowned for.

The best thing about this city for me is the location. It's a 20 minute bus journey from the airport to the city centre. It was £1.00 for a single into the city centre on the bus (every 15 minutes) or you can take an uber for £7.00 if you want to avoid telling your suitcase to f**k off everytime it collides with your shins on the bus.

For a meal in Poznans picturesque square, we tried some of the local cuisine with several beers which worked out only £22 for EVERYTHING. And don't get me started on the "Ministery of Vodka" which served blow the heed aff ye vodka for around £1.00 (what a selection of vodkas in here, enough to even make Rasputin mad wae it).

I'll maybe do a few wee posts with specific meal reviews and places of interest we visited. However the main thing all you nosy f**kers will want to know is how much it cost to get there:

3 nights, 4 days.
Flights from Edinburgh - £70pp with Ryanair
City Centre Ibis (really clean and Stylish) - £60pp

Cheaper to get oot yer tit's on bison grass vodka in Poland than go a night oot in Glasgow!

Why stay in the rainy UK when you can take yer citreon c1 to Stansted Airport and get flights for £40pp to Seville?!! (t...
08/10/2023

Why stay in the rainy UK when you can take yer citreon c1 to Stansted Airport and get flights for £40pp to Seville?!! (that includes priority flights so I've packed enough shorts tae get shares in Mike Ashley's gaff!!). I am however, roasted oot ma man cities as its currently 40 degrees. In all seriousness, you should really think about going further afield when catching flights, particularly us Scots as the options at Scottish airports are limited and expensive as f**k. At the end of the day, if youve got a wee diddy car like mine youll get to any airport on fumes! We're also staying in a 4 star fancy gaff which I'll post more about later!!!

Sorry troops that I've neglected the blog after giving you all such hope on the cheap holiday front 🤣 I've been working ...
29/07/2023

Sorry troops that I've neglected the blog after giving you all such hope on the cheap holiday front 🤣 I've been working 2 jobs so I can afford some content for you all so I promise I'll post some recent travels past and present when I get a chance to sit on my erse (I'm due putting ma gaff on air b&b cause am never in it)

HOWEVER, I just wanted to appear to tell ye about a wee purse friendly day trip to Belfast. This week, we decided to check prices for the Stena Line Ferry from Cairnryan to Belfast (what else is Keiran gonna do while he waits for plaster to dry) and to my surprise it was only £22pp on a Saturday in the height of the summer hols!!! We set sail on the 7.30am ferry and sailed home to on the 7.30pm ferry (ps, its only £5 to park your car at Cairnryan Ferry Terminal for the full day, is that no how much a freddo is these days?).

As we arrived in Belfast (with just a rucksack and I know I'm from Kilwinning but I didnt carry flute in this rucksack) around 9.45am, we had all day to explore. Just a wee tip, I would get a taxi from the ferry terminal and not the bus cause it works out the same price, if not cheaper and yer not waiting about (the bus leaves at specific times only and taxis are already there and you can download a taxi app or use the freephone in the terminal as well).

I Martin Lewis'd the shizzer out of today and kept the day as cheap as possible starting with a free tour of City Hall which has exhibitions about the city's history. Guided tours are available between 11-4 FREE every day on the hour but you can also walk around at your own leisure free of charge.

Obviously a day trip isn't a day trip without eating yerself into a coma so as we were on a budget, we ate at St George's Market which has a wide variety of food choices. I opted for Veg Gyozas which were £5 for 6 and a vegetarian meal deal from the Indian stall which included 2 curries, rice, salad and small pakoras for £10. Keiran opted for a Cuban beef sandwich which was £7 and we shared a wee portion of Dutch pancakes which were £4. Theres also live music on most of the time at the market and loads of crafty stuff to clutter up yer hoose with and its opened 9-3 on a Saturday. Talking aboot the Dutch, thought I was stoned oot ma nut with ma cheap visit to Belfast.

20/06/2023

Sunset from Fira (Santorini) last night 🥹💛

Good morning from a roasty toasty Santorini!! I had hoped to blog whilst actively at places on this holiday but unfortun...
20/06/2023

Good morning from a roasty toasty Santorini!! I had hoped to blog whilst actively at places on this holiday but unfortunately a combination of the peesh signal and dyslexia due to the Ouzo and Mythos consumed made this impossible. (promise I'll do loads of follow up posts in the coming days though!!!)

I just wanted to jump on and say....get yer holiday to Santorini booked. I've went from Blacklands igloo coloured to adonis babe in 5 days (arms only).

I suggest definitely going to Santorini in the middle of June. We're staying in Perissa which is South-East of the island and we're away from the hustle and bustle of yon untalented influencers with the big man cities and the nae brains. The resort is lovely and quiet (but not too quiet were you're talking to yourself). I'll say more about the amenities and what to do in a separate post.

****IMPORTANT - I really just wanted to jump on and say for a JET2 package holiday including FLIGHTS, ACCOMMODATION, TRANSFERS AND 22KG of luggage from Leeds Bradford Airport we were £350pp. For our fellow Scots, we priced the same holiday from Edinburgh and we were around £800pp (you can get another trip with that)!!****

You can drive to Leeds Bradford Airport from Glasgow in around 3.5hrs and as the flights weren't until 4.35pm you don't even need to fork out for accommodation the night before!! We however booked to stay at the Britannia Hotel the night before which cost £120 PER COUPLE but included hotel overnight stay and 8 nights parking and is 6 minute drive in a taxi to the airport https://www.britanniahotels.com/hotels/the-britannia-hotel-leeds/offers?gad=1&gclid=Cj0KCQjwnMWkBhDLARIsAHBOfto7s5GUTcrK9pcWHWlgbKfRrvdtaHCfysGFFJd1iK80skjss3Y-QWUaAri7EALw_wcB

Check out the sunset from the Islands capital FIRA last night (I also suggest going here rather than OIA for the sunset as that place is insufferably busy and no amount of sertraline could calm you down there and even WAGS of the world couldnt afford the prices there).

For those who know me, you'll know that the word random was created for the mental sh*t I do so tonight I've ended up in...
13/06/2023

For those who know me, you'll know that the word random was created for the mental sh*t I do so tonight I've ended up in Bradford for a curry 🤣 I'm actually flying to Santorini from Leeds tomorrow (which I'll fill you all in on from tomorrow obv)

Tonight we visited Prashad which is a vegetarian indian restaurant. As Bradford is the curry capital of the UK, its safe to say I was buzzing out my man cities to get my gums right in about a chasni (i never even got a chasni). This restaurant has been awarded the Michelin award for amazing quality food at cooncil prices. We tried the fixed price menu which was £45 PER COUPLE and consisted of poppadoms and chutney tray, 2 starters to share, a masala dosa to share and a thali to share (I've shared a photo of the menu as my spelling of dishes outwith the vocabulary of cooncil cuisine is diabolical)

To drink, I had a pineapple and coconut mojito. At £8.45, it was worth the money as it stopped my tatas from sweating and had a high alcohol content as it made Keiran look like Martin Compston.

As you can see from the second photo, I enjoyed the food that much that I volleyed Keiran square on the beak. Kiddin on, its sweet beetroot on the plate for the poppadums and not blood. I literally would do time for this food though, amazing.

MUNICHACCOMMODATION - NOVOTEL SUITES PARK STADE SCHWABING - 120 EUROS FOR 3 NIGHTS IN TOTAL (prices correct at June 22) ...
05/06/2023

MUNICH

ACCOMMODATION - NOVOTEL SUITES PARK STADE SCHWABING - 120 EUROS FOR 3 NIGHTS IN TOTAL (prices correct at June 22) https://all.accor.com/hotel/5229/index.en.shtml?utm_campaign=seo+maps&utm_medium=seo+maps&utm_source=google+Maps

After our wee stoat to Erding thinking we were Sound of Music extras, we travelled from Munich airport to the centre of Munich to stay for 3 nights. We travelled from the hotel to the airport via bus (5 minutes) then got the train direct to our apartment. This apartment complex was around 50 mins on the train from the airport (included in the monthly travel ticket we bought). The rooms were basic but also had some cooking facilities if you wanted to be a right tight bastardo and get yer koka noodles on the stove. From this apartment, there was a metro stop a 10 minute walk away which took you into the various districts of Munich (again, travel included in this 9 EURO monthly ticket - we really are getting robbed in the UK)

Some highlights in Munich for me were:
3rd REICH WALKING TOUR - if you're an absolute history gimp like myself you will love this. This walking tour lasted around 2.5 hours and included landmarks such as where Hi**er formed the n**i party and where he stopped to draw some of his art (disclaimer - Keiran had a questionable tash before we visited Madrid but I got him to shave that the f**k off). There are multiple walking tours which can be booked on Viator https://www.viator.com/Munich-tourism/d487-r6555465131-s110445251?m=64814&supag=102456786928&supsc=kwd-371968079437&supai=421127616147&supdv=c&supnt=g&suplp=9180774&supli=&supti=kwd-371968079437&tsem=true&supci=kwd-371968079437&supap1=&supap2=&gclid=Cj0KCQjwj_ajBhCqARIsAA37s0wyiWBtKuIQ5lLV1U2yT_vs8BF09VIQZHzOXYL0qSudYCTFnM0w9HYaAkimEALw_wcB and the one we done costs £39 for the both of us.

DACHAU CONCENTRATION CAMP Dachau concentration camp - This place is a must visit to learn about the atrocious events of the n**is and is easily accessible from bus or train from Munich city centre. Although an incredibly sad place, it celebrates the life of notable people who were imprisoned here through a fantastic museum facility. I would recommend booking Dachau before you visit as the capacity sells out most days, particularly if you want a guided tour. We opted to tour the facility ourselves with an audio guide which was helpful. I can't remember the exact price for this but we were no more than 40 EURO in total.

MUNICH DOCUMENTATION CENTRE - again, if you're interested in history, this place is fantastic, It's a free museum and you can spend hours reading about The Nazi's and various other aspects of the 2nd world war.

And of course, who would visit Munich without getting your gums about the various steins in the beer hooses???? We visited a few but my favourite was Paulaner Brauhaus Paulaner Bräuhaus as the beer was fanastic and made me emotional when Mick Jagger sang H***y Tonk Woman. I highly recommend the large pretzels from as they definitely soak up the alcohol. We did eat here and I got the vegetarian special of the day and i'm not going to lie, it was nice but I still don't have a clue to this day what it was. Keiran got some traditional German dish, again it was in German so he could have been eating puffer fish for all I know. We were around 60 EURO in total here but had a good few pints and food.

One of the other Brauhaus's that we visited was Lowenbraukeller Löwenbräukeller . The steins were bigger than my forehead here and the German's were playing some radge music on a big horn thing and everybody had to get up and swing yer steins. It was a bizarre time in my life. We had a few beers here and a 3 course traditional German Meal and were 90EURO in TOTAL.

The rest of the time for food, we just ate Turkish Kebabs (me veggie, Keiran meaty!!) as there are numerous Turkish kebab restaurants (for takeaway and sit in) located throughout the city and you can get a meal (kebab dish, chips and a drink) for under 10 euro if you've spent all your money tanning steins like us

As expected, after copious amounts of white & rose wine on Saturday night, I fell asleep heed first into my laptop when ...
05/06/2023

As expected, after copious amounts of white & rose wine on Saturday night, I fell asleep heed first into my laptop when writing about last years trip from Madrid to Munich so here's take two of my horrendous patter regarding the latter half of the trip.

From the roasting dry heat of Madrid (honestly, my ni**le ends were aboot roasted aff during the 40 degree heat wave), we travelled onto the pishing rain of Munich. Although we were travelling for the sole purpose of The Rolling Stones....again (I know Mick Jagger is a fossil but he's my favourite guy ever, sorry Keiran), I would recommended Madrid - Munich as a route if you're wishing to see two countries in the one city break as flights from Madrid - Munich (single) cost £43 with Air Europa.

When we arrived in Munich around 7pm, we checked into the Moxy airport hotel for the night (https://www.marriott.com/en-us/hotels/mucox-moxy-munich-airport/overview/?scid=f2ae0541-1279-4f24-b197-a979c79310b0) which cost around £70 (for the room) and was very funky as the aesthetics matched my hair (am I a scheme hipster??). This hotel has 24hr check in and more importantly, 24hr food and drink!! Cause who cares if you're stranded outside, as long as you have a currywurst??? There is also a bus for a small fee from the airport straight to the hotel. Perfect if you're weighed down by all yer adidas trainers you brought to Germany to show off.

ERDING

As we can't enjoy each other's company after a long day of travelling without heedlocks getting dished out, we noticed there was a bus stop right outside our hotel and decided to take a look to where the most frequent bus went as a monthly (yes monthly!!) travel ticket last year cost 9 EURO (it was a deal the German government had across the country for travel on most modes of transport in the summer last year). From this, we discovered the wee town of Erding which was around 20mins on the bus from the Moxy hotel. This wee town was more German than Angela Merkel tanning a stein of pilsner in some lederhosen.

The town is actually where Erdinger beer is brewed so if you like a pint, this is definitely the town for you. Just don't get too pished as most folk don't really speak English/Scottish slang here as you can see per the first photo as "f***y" is proudly displayed in the window. There are a few nice squares which mostly specialise in traditional German food and lots of outside seating areas in the towns squares for your pint of Erdinger. If you're familiar with the Europeans, you know they'll sit outside and have a pint in any weather (my kind of people).

I had said in a previous post that if me and Keiran can't be bothered saying pleasantries in the language of the country we are in then we go to an Indian restaurant to eat due to their broad English skills. Not in the Indian restaurant we ate here but we got by and by the end of my meal I was danke'd up to my eyeballs. On a serious note, the Indian thali plates at TAJ INDSCHES TAJ Indisches Restaurant - Erding were amazing and I had a veggie platter whilst Keiran had the meat thali. For this we were 42 EURO in total and had an alcoholic drink with this. As you can see, the love Keiran has for the indian scran is more than he has for me.

I would say this place is perfect for a wee trip off the beaten track and to see a more traditional town as opposed to the big cities that Germany has to offer.

A wee foodie Madrid post for you all next. I'm currently in Kilwinning tanning some wine from a previous trip but these ...
04/06/2023

A wee foodie Madrid post for you all next. I'm currently in Kilwinning tanning some wine from a previous trip but these temperatures are making me long for a Spanish night.

VIVA BURGER Viva Burger - This was a restaurant that specialised in fully vegetarian burgers but even your meat eating palates would have enjoyed this. Wedges better than oor McCains. 2 burger mains and a drink each cost 36 EURO IN TOTAL. There was loads of healthy detox juices if you were wanting the sh*ts as well (photo 1).

We spent most of our time in Mercado de San Miguel Mercado de San Miguel which was an indoor market that specialised in hispanic type cuisine such as Argentinian, Colombia, Cuban and authentic Spanish. I indulged in Spanish omelettes the size of my foreheed and that is what I absolutely live for. The massive 3 EURO glasses of wine were to live for also. (Photo 2-9)

The last place for a mention food wise was Meson de Champinon Mesón del Champiñón - Oficial. This specialised in tapas and the padron peppers and garlic mushrooms made my life complete.They were a bit pricey (about 10EURO per tapas dish) but the restaurant is situated in the centre of Madrid and fab for people watching and pretending you are fluent in Spanish patter(photo 10 onwards)

As per my memories on facebook, it's been a year since I went to Madrid and Munich to see The Rolling Stones so thought ...
03/06/2023

As per my memories on facebook, it's been a year since I went to Madrid and Munich to see The Rolling Stones so thought i'd do a few wee posts whilst tanning a bottle of Chardonnay in my scheme palace (I might fall asleep after the first post so it will be to be continued over the next few nights).

MADRID (prices correct when travelling last year)
HOTEL - IBIS MADRID CENTRO LAS VENTAS (216 euro for 2 people for 3 nights 31/05/22 - 02/06/22 https://all.accor.com/hotel/7438/index.en.shtml - sorry but i'm not Ramsdens so i'm not sure how much that is in oor Charlie boys pound)
FLIGHTS - DUBLIN - MADRID (£60pp for priority ryanair flight)

We had a cheeky wee overnight stay in Dublin tanning Guinness before we traveled onto Madrid. A wee tip but flying to Dublin and staying a night in the premier inn at the airport can be cheaper than flying direct from Scotland and there are so many destinations to chose from Dublin airport!!

My pasty white Scottish skin absolutely loves a wee trip to a Spanish City to eat some patatas bravas and tan some sangria. Again, we stayed in a trusty Ibis which had a lovely wee bar and was around 30 mins from the airport via the underground which is pennies to use. There is an underground station right outside this hotel which takes you into the midst of the city centre to see the football stadiums, historic buildings etc (around 15 mins) and I would recommended buying a day ticket for the underground which is around 8 euro per day.

In relation to attractions in Madrid (i'll do a seperate post for food, don't worry ya greedy bassas), definitely book a ticket for the city sightseeing bus at the start of your trip as a 48hr ticket costs you around 27 EURO PP (can use this as many times as you like within the 48hrs) and stops at attractions such as the Bernabeu, the Kings Palace, the golden triangle of art (to pretend you're inty Picasso when you never even took Art as a standard grade subject) and some of the lovely parks that Madrid has to offer.

If you're into art, I would recommend visiting Museo Del Prado (around 15 EURO ENTRY PP) as this has one of the best world collections of European art based on the Spanish royal collection and is the single best Spanish art museum which has numerous works by Goya.

In relation to some of the free attractions Madrid has to offer (for my tight Tam Mullen basterts out there), I would recommended visiting the cathedrals (even if you're a big atheist like myself - sorry Jesus big man). Buildings such as the Igelesia Cathedral are absolutely stunning inside and keep you away from heatstroke for free for a wee while. Another fab place to visit is the Park El Retiro which is fabulous for a wee stroll or a picnic or for hallucinating free of charge as Madrid is absolutely f**king boiling. The park has a cafe which you can get a cold can of beer or a wee pizza from and a large body of water which you can hire a pedalo boat from and pretend you're in Bridgerton.

We also visited the Wanda Metropoliatano where Atletico Madrid play (yes, I do know for sadiums for a chick) for The Rolling Stones gig and I would recommend a wee Stadium tour or for a gig as it has fantastic views over the city.

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