Allens Ashburton

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Allens Ashburton Locally owned and operated by Darryl and Kylie Burrowes since 2004. Ruralco Suppliers. Prompt, friendly service. Modern fleet of realiable vehicles.

Septic tanks, Effluent Disposal, Drain cleaning and CCTV. Liquid Waste Disposal Company, locally owned and operated by Darryl and Kylie Burrowes. Servicing septic tanks, dairy sumps/saucers/ponds, portaloos, grease traps, swimming pools, holding tanks. Also have drain cleaning machine and Jetting truck with powerful water blasting capabilities. ATS/Ruralco Supplier. Call 3085293 or Darryl on 0274333563

Poowife Dairies – passing the batonThere is a new and improved Poowife! Be gentle with her dear readers, she’s new to t...
11/10/2026

Poowife Dairies – passing the baton

There is a new and improved Poowife! Be gentle with her dear readers, she’s new to the Pooworld but has a cracking sense of humour and is ready to give it all a go.

Simon and Susan Patterson are the brand new owners of Allens Ashburton and we couldn’t be happier that our 22 year old baby is being passed into the right hands. What does this mean for you dear reader? ... not a lot really. Nothing is going to change. Josh and Chris will still be the lads on the job, and Simon is currently learning the ropes with Pooman - good luck with that Simon!

We have loved every minute of owning Allens Ashburton and thank you all for your support and business, but it’s time to hand the baton onto someone with a little more energy and enthusiasm! We were lucky to find a wonderful couple who have the same mind-set, values and morals as us and know that the customer always comes first and great service is the most important thing.

I will try and get Darryl to have some time off, maybe see a little bit of our beautiful country! Wish me luck. If you hear someone screaming, it will be me as he will be driving me nuts ;)
Poowife out x

This is Chris. Well a cartoon version. But a cool one. Chris is cool. Way cool 😎 no Chris is not making me say this. He...
01/10/2026

This is Chris. Well a cartoon version. But a cool one. Chris is cool. Way cool 😎 no Chris is not making me say this. He is nice. He wouldn't do that. (Blackmail is a crime...just saying)...

Today we celebrate Chris because it is Chris's born day. He is not old, he is well seasoned. He is mature, intelligent, funny, good looking and wise like all people born in 1972.

We know Chris will have a wonderful day because he is in his favorite place. His S**t Truck, WESUCK. So give him a wave, high five or a cuddle if you see him. He especially likes cuddles from dairy farmers. They are the best. 🤣😁

Happy birthday Chris Frost. The world is your oyster. Hope you like oysters. See you later to light a muffin on fire.

The Poocru ❤️

Poowife Diaries:Pottering around the kitchen, doing Poowife stuff when I look out the kitchen window....GASP, clutching ...
22/09/2026

Poowife Diaries:
Pottering around the kitchen, doing Poowife stuff when I look out the kitchen window....GASP, clutching my pearls....what the hell do i see? I take off my glasses - god knows why - rub my useless eyeballs and dash out the back door. Glasses back on, phone in hand to take a better look...ZOOOOOM....is that Pooman lying on the grass?? "The lump looks too small", I think. "Has he fallen into something". "OMG what do I do"??

Enter Pooman stage right, winding in the fence reel. I release the breath that I was holding onto and blow the cat into next week.

It's his fecking high-vis jacket that he's thrown on the ground. Time to go to SpecSavers me thinks.

Off to have a cup of tea and a lie down. Oh and find the cat.

Poowife Dairies This will resonate with many of you that have partners that are self employed or tradies or blokes who l...
13/09/2026

Poowife Dairies
This will resonate with many of you that have partners that are self employed or tradies or blokes who love a spot of DIY. For many, many years it's always been the call to arms. "Come and help me outside would you?" "But it's 3 degrees and raining 🌧", "it's OK, I'll only need to you stand and hold this pipe above your head for a couple of minutes...". "You mean this big, heavy, greasy pole, covered in God knows what?". "Yup". "Cool...3 hours later".

I have a hack. It's called make your own helper. This is something that you can make yourself but you need to put the groundwork in early. "Oh going for a ride in Dads big truck...how exciting!!!" Build it up, over exaggerate how much fun they will have getting out and helping Dad. It can be your son or in our case daughter. I've put 20 years of hard work into this helper and it's finally come to fruition. No longer does Pooman ask me for help. Poo Daughter is first choice. Oh how i rejoice. Watching them working together, her zooming around in the digger. No more arguments about dropping s**t, holding torches, freezing my arse off. Hallelujah!!

And I get to sit in the sun and eat my birthday cake. Happy days 😁
Better living everyone.

Happy Farters Day! Pooman is a pretty big deal around our house. The Little S**ts seem to think that he's done an above ...
06/09/2026

Happy Farters Day! Pooman is a pretty big deal around our house. The Little S**ts seem to think that he's done an above average job being a Dad and I reluctantly have to agree. As much s**t as I give him, he's an outstanding farter. Loves unconditionally and is a fierce supporter and protector. Although in the same breath he will cheat his arse off to win a round of Wii golf. Winning is sometimes more important than feelings 🤣 I'm just stoked that I don't have to cook tonight and that the lolly jar has been replenished.

Oh well, looks like if this poo thing doesn't work out for them, they can always fall back on their modelling careers! ...
03/09/2026

Oh well, looks like if this poo thing doesn't work out for them, they can always fall back on their modelling careers! Bit cute really. And here I was thinking that they were out there, hard at work. Hard at work on a coffee and a slice by the looks of things!

Poowife DiariesDay 1,00238474 of doing office work. Nothing exciting has happened. Pooman hasn't done anything stupid ...
25/08/2026

Poowife Diaries
Day 1,00238474 of doing office work.

Nothing exciting has happened. Pooman hasn't done anything stupid which is very disappointing and very unlike him. Maybe I should book him in for a brain scan as something isn't right.

Pooboy is also behaving and just working and getting everything right, damn it all to hell. Chris is always good but it would be nice if he fell in a huge puddle and someone was there to document it. Come on people, work with me here! How dare they all be good at their jobs and not provide me with any content. Pack of selfish bastards! Oh well, back to work for me then. Yawn. Might go to town and do some damage to the bank account. Spice things up a bit! Bahahahaha!

Toodaloooo!

PS: here is a photo of me squatting in a paddock. I'm not having a s**t, it's called yoga people! Namaste.

Poowife DairiesIt's not very often but sometimes the stars align and I get to share food and time with Pooman AND Pooboy...
06/08/2026

Poowife Dairies
It's not very often but sometimes the stars align and I get to share food and time with Pooman AND Pooboy.

They were out on a job together holding hands and checking out some Pigeon poo whilst I was at Woolies getting enough cold and flu stuff to stuff into Pooman to help him s**u oh...I mean feel better. Man Flu...it's real (apparently)... I didn't know the human body could make that much snot 🤢

Anyway, I said let's meet at Taste Cafe. We had heard that they have the cleanest stormwater drains in town 🤣. Didn't check the drains but I had the feeling Pooman really wanted to. A hairy eyeball from me sat his arse down.

Food and drinks ordered from the fabulous selection we found a perch. Chatting amongst ourselves the lovely Ellie brought the coffees over. ☕️ I love people that are creative and like a laugh and she absolutely nailed it. Yes that's a Poo emoji in the coffee 💩, absolutely brilliant 🤣🤣🤣

10/10 for the company, food, s**ts and giggles!! Thanks Rebecca and team! Bloody brilliant 😂😍

Woop woop! The girls played so well this season, so proud of them, especially our daughter in law Sarah! They weren't ke...
05/08/2026

Woop woop! The girls played so well this season, so proud of them, especially our daughter in law Sarah! They weren't keen on being call the Pooball Girls for some reason....🤣

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P O Box 59
Ashburton
7700

Telephone

+6433085293

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